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Average Joe


 Max the Wonder Dog: A Fantasy
 

Music of the Day: Lee Ritenour, Dream Away

I haven't been able to find my cell phone for the last couple of days; I must have dropped it somewhere here in the ranch house, maybe a carpeted area where I wouldn't have heard it hit the floor. That's really annoying, to misplace something that important. But the other day, I noticed that Max the Wonder Dog was doing some kind of weird seizure-like dance in the library--movin' and groovin', spinnin' around, tryin' to get to his tail, which for him, of late, is pretty darned unusual. I mean, he's almost twelve years old and mostly all he does is sleep, eat, stink, sleep, poop, sleep, stink, poop, and pass gas (what RB calls "ass bombs"). But this latest dance craze has me worried--and wondering--did Max the Wonder Dog find my cell phone? Did I set the ringer on vibrate?

Actually, Max is with our friends Ruth and Cliff for the remainder of the week; MLB isn't really strong enough yet to handle the beast on his increasing number of daily walkies/dumpies trips outside. He's a bull terrier and he's strong as hell and he weighs about 75 pounds, 74 pounds of which is solid muscle and one pound of which is brain--maybe. So, ol' Max is hangin' with a bunch of other really big dogs while we work on gettin' MLB a little stronger.

You'd think with all the steroids she's taking that she'd be ready for spring training now, maybe launch a few 500-foot homeruns, or fire a few 98 mile an hour fastballs at somebody's head, but right now her legs are a little weak, especially in the morning. Maybe that's why so many baseball games are played in the afternoon or evening. . . .

We have so much food in the house, we're thinking about opening a deli--people have brought us so much food that we're both gaining weight, although for MLB the weight gain just might be the steroids (again, with the steroids!). Ha! But really, we have so many people to thank for all the good grub--Dr. Phil and Deb for some killer chili (and beer), Donna and Boyd for a smokin' chicken casserole, Deb (again) for a monster chocolate/cherry cake that caused great sluggishness for me on the tennis court, Donna M. for a chicken tetrazinni--and there's more, but I'm starting to salivate again, so I must stop now. Thanks to so many good people for feeding us--we'd both be dead if we had to rely on my cooking "skills." Thanks, y'all!

AJ

TO LIVE IN FREEDOM'S LIGHT IS THE RIGHT OF MANKIND.
Posted by JoeVet at 12:09 AM - 2 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Churchill, Defeat, and Modern America
 

Music of the Day: Lee Ritenour, Dream Away

I couldn't help myelf; last night, despite the low back pain, I stumbled out of the ranch house and headed to our local chain bookstore. I knew the "new" book by Rick Atkinson was on the shelves, so while running a book-related errand for MLB, I snagged the last available copy of The Day of Battle: The War in Sicily and Italy, 1943-1944. I also picked up another book, by Burt Prelutsky, entitled Conservatives Are From Mars, Liberals Are From San Francisco--more on that one a little later.

But first, back to Atkinson; regular readers here know that I recently read, and highly recommended the first of his so-called "liberation trilogy," An Army At Dawn, which was stomp-down damned good reading. While standing around at the slaughterhouse today, waiting for the critters to settle before the day's festivities, I began reading The Day of Battle, and I came across this gem. Referring to Winston Churchill, Atkinson writes "it [Churchill's greatness] was perhaps best captured by an admirer's seven-word encomium:'There is no defeat in his heart.'"

Contrast that observation of Churchill with the Senate Majority Leader, the despicable H. Reid; it would be nice to hear of some present-day leader, Dem or Rep, of whom we could say "there is no defeat in his heart." It might be fair to ask which of the ostensible nominees, Mr. McCain and Mr. Obama, might best qualify to have that statement applied to him. Which man is more likely to have "no defeat in his heart?"

Mr. Obama's foreign policy maunderings do not lead me to believe that he understands, at any level, that America faces enemies and warriors who are willing to do unspeakable things to Americans and westerners in general--the battles that are being waged, and will be waged further in our future, are not rhetorical in nature, they are not akin to the battles fought in polite debating situations, and their consequences are far more serious than garnering applause or avoiding opprobrium. Is there anything that convinces you that Mr. Obama has no "defeat in his heart?"

Is there anything that convinces you that Mr. McCain has no "defeat in his heart?" There is much that convinces me of that--and if you wish to learn more of Mr. McCain's heart in the face of terror, physical pain, the shame of a forced "confession," and his commitment to his fellow soldiers and this nation, there are many accounts of his personal sacrifice and honor and bravery. So far as I know, the same cannot be said of Mr. Obama. I want someone in the White House who has no "defeat in his heart."

AJ

TO LIVE IN FREEDOM'S LIGHT IS THE RIGHT OF MANKIND.
Posted by JoeVet at 9:09 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 The Back is Back
 

Music of the Day: Nestor Torres, House Call

Earlier today, in a fit of misplaced energy and the desire to do something constructive in the couple of hours of nice weather we experienced this afternoon, I hauled myself outside, with a farm implement in hand, and proceeded to hack away at various unwanted weed-like plants encroaching on our plot 'o land from the east. I spent thirty minutes, tops, thrashing and digging and raking and grunting and, under my breath, uttering oaths against the fool (me) who decided this was a good idea on a nice afternoon. Had sanity prevailed, I would have taken the live-and-let-live approach to the weeds for another couple of weeks, or months, and headed instead to the tennis courts for a while; my back always hurts after playing, but at least I can walk afterwards. My back is now completely knotted with painful spasms and even 800mgs of Motrin and eleven beers hasn't helped (yet). I think I will be hard pressed to tie shoes in the morning, which means the sandals will be the footwear of the day tomorrow, rain or shine, or snow, or whatever.

In other medical news, MLB is slightly improved after her return from hospital, although the pneumonia is tenacious and enervating and has put her down in a way that I have never seen before. Even major spinal surgery in 2001 didn't keep her down this long, so this was some serious stuff in her lungs. If you know of anyone who has whatever respiratory crud is circulating amongst us, please encourage that person to get serious, professional medical help as soon as possible.

And finally, re: my Oscar predictions. I guess I was wrong about the assembled high school graduates calling President Bush an idiot or a moron--apparently that never made it into the show this time. Good. As for my other prediction, I believe I was right--no mention was made of the men and women in uniform keeping us safe to make, and see, silly movies, bad movies, grotesque movies, and anti-war movies. Not a peep. Remember the days when Hollywood made movies with American soldiers, sailors, marines, and airmen portrayed as heroes?

Oh, just one more note regarding movies--if you have time, Google "Air France Stewardess video" and search a bit for a rather risque flight-deck home-movie on an Air France flight. Is there no FAA in France?!?!

AJ

TO LIVE IN FREEDOM'S LIGHT IS THE RIGHT OF MANKIND.
Posted by JoeVet at 9:53 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 My Oscar Predictions
 

Music of the Day, Part III: Porcupine, Slider Inside

The program hasn't begun, has it? I hope not, because I want to make a couple of predictions.

First, I'm guessing that at least one of the presenters or recipients at tonight's ceremonies will imply or actually call the current President of the United States an idiot or a moron. Said presenter or recipient may well only be a high school graduate, but he or she will be a "star." Still another presenter or recipient, perhaps also a high school graduate, will make comment on the futility and stupidity of America's foreign policy in the MIddle East and our failed policies towards our neighbor to the south, the wonderful and peaceful island state of Cuba, where health care is free. The recently retired dictator of Cuba will likely be applauded for being a thorn in the side of American presidents for more than 50 years--a lifetime achievement award, of a sort.

Second, none of the assembled "stars" will acknowledge the sacrifices made by the men and women in our armed forces in securing our freedoms or the freedoms of others in far away lands. The only possible mention of our military that might be made by any one of the assembled "stars" will be in connection with accusations about rape, murder, torture, and mayhem inflicted on various peoples around the globe by our soldiers, sailors, marines, and airmen.

Because I won't watch the program itself, I'll have to rely on after-action reports in the news and from readers of this blog--but perhaps you can say you read it here, first.

AJ

TO LIVE IN FREEDOM'S LIGHT IS THE RIGHT OF MANKIND.
Posted by JoeVet at 8:33 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 Obama Issues
 

Music of the Day, Part II: Steve Cole, From the Start

I've included in my favorite sites, to the right, the Obama "issues" page from the official Obama for President website. I will make no comment other than to encourage you to read the Obama view of the issues, if you can. Remeber that Mr. Obama is "asking you to believe. . .not just in my ability to bring about real change in Washington. . .I'm asking you to believe in yours." Also, remember the promise for a total withdrawal of troops from Iraq within 16 months. Enjoy.

AJ

TO LIVE IN FREEDOM'S LIGHT IS THE RIGHT OF ALL MANKIND.
Posted by JoeVet at 2:42 PM - No Comments   Add a Comment  
 
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Author: JoeVet
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